File Size: 14928 KB
Print Length: 288 pages
Publisher: Scribe; UK Edition edition (September 29, 2014)
Publication Date: September 29, 2014
In merely a couple of weeks, the advice in this book has really turned around my interactions with my daughter and has enabled me to almost universally nip the woman tantrums in the marijuana. As a work-at-home parent, this translates to more happiness, greater productivity, and much, much less stress.
I can't speak to how well this will work with teenagers with better verbal skills (but since the crux from it is paying attention and connecting, it seems like good advice even to relieve symptoms of adults), but with a toddler with a pretty good ability to understand but quite a limited vocabulary and ability expressing herself verbally, this method has worked wonders.
Most of the trick is in the nanosecond before you react--simply asking yourself why. Why is my kid being a jerk? Usually the answer is obvious (in our case, the girl wants either attention or some object/situation she aren't have), but being aware of the cause shades your reaction just enough for connecting. In the past, if I just tried to put her off for a couple minutes to finish my task, her distress would quickly escalate and the girl would become whiny, clingy and just a little insufferable.
While it does take more effort to actually participate rather than acting on hands-off, I'm learning that a little advanced budgeting (like, seriously, a minute or two) of genuine connection at attention when my child just starts to go sideways can put out the fire and quickly deliver plenty of extended, silent play. Magic.
The useful tips of just taking a second to actually connect, make eye contact, give you a moment of comfort, etc., before explaining and redirecting make the process easier. Plus the authors' trick of pointing out how much if this would annoy you company was treating you in the same manner really helps internalize the flaws in the conventional parenting advice. We also like they comprehensive distinctions between giving love/attention/setting boundaries and spoiling (e. g., shielding child from negative feelings/situations, never requiring accountability, making excuses, or giving the kid too much *stuff*).
While, like all self-help books, the same basic ideas are repeated many different ways, and you could begin to feel like " okay, okay, We *get* it, " We do feel like the repetition and examples performed help me internalize the methods, and--just as importantly--helped give me a adequate sense of it to describe the concepts well to a partner (I'm the reader/filterer of the parenting books in our family). The particular other upshot is that hammering the ideas into your brain really will help stop you when you begin to react in your default, autopilot way, so you as a parent can stop your own bad behavior and model how a smart, thoughtful person should act, even if wise choices may always come naturally; ).
Nutrients, and effective., Not really all strongly related my circumstances, but the parts that were gave me some good advice, I feel so excited about this book! My son is a little too young to use a lot of the ideas here, but I love that We know how I want to discipline as he or she grows older. It makes so much sense to me and i also love that it is based on research and not just opinion., Perfectly written by a certified team of authors. The particular key points are tackled in depth but can still be easily applied to actual situations that occur. It is not necessarily a over the top technically written book and makes for a easier and more practical read., This publication is everything!, graet publication, Loving this book. Large eye opener
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